sitting, waiting, wishing (thanks jack johnson)

I am sitting in a Starbucks off of I35 in Lewisville. The music playing is that folksy happy toned music which makes for a relaxing moment. The iced coffee I had did nothing to perk me up a bit.

This week has been a beating, but not the kind that kicks me to the curb and I'm not able to get up again. It's been a test.

How much do I want my (insert everything here)?

Taking two summer classes has proven to be an undertaking. Were I only taking 2 classes, this would be a no-brainer but that is not the case. Two classes, fulfilling my own expectations as husband, doing the kind of job at work I expect of myself, and then just keeping emotional space for all the family stuff going on is a bit of an undertaking.

The question I posed above is pretty much what keeps me motivated. I want a master's degree to have letters after my name and so I can progress forward in my career. I want to do well at work so that I can succeed there and hopefully set myself up to progress far forward when it's time.

Personally, I expect to be the best husband I can be. I don't do half assed relationships and for me to be me, well, I need to be present and support my amazing wife as she supports me. This is a bit much to take on at times, but I press on, because it's important to me.

I speak to God often about all of this too. At some point, He might have other plans for me, but for now, we press onward because there is a reason for all of this that is going on. I am starting to truly believe that nothing happens just because. I think that I sort of felt this way before but lately, it just seems to make sense. There is a plan and a supreme being that is totally completely aware of all that is, was, and will be. How could there not be? Is man the pinnacle of it all? This question is of course silly, but fun to ponder.

This might read as a bit of a stream of consciousness and hey, it might be. As I said before, this week has me battered and bruised but I'm still standing. Dalena and I are on the road (more on this in a moment) but had to stop since she has a meeting with the North Texas Association of Play Therapy. I may have this wrong but it's something like that. Anyway, she is President-Elect and had this meeting tonight. She will meet and then we will head out to Houston. Then, tomorrow, after taking my exam and she finishes a paper, we will roll toward Harlingen. It's going to be a long road trip but we've got food, drinks and Harry Potter on CD.

The trip is long but sometimes long trips are necessary. My grandmother passed away and she will be missed. We're going to Harlingen to pay tribute to her. I will write more about her in another post. I think I will also share the words I said about my maternal grandfather too. Lately, there have been many moments which cause a mass amount of reflection. Time moves forward and there is nothing we can do to stop it. (remember earlier when I asked if we were the pinnacle of everything?)

So as time presses forward, look around at things. Is this really where we want to be? AS a people I mean? Is this how things really ought to be? We can be better as a people, and we have all the power and technology at our disposal to make it...we just have to get out of our own way.

Now I'm about to pull off a correlation between what I just wrote and what I was talking about before...

Things have been crazy lately, not just for me personally, but in the world. I wonder what it is all for...maybe to prepare us for times ahead? We train now for what the future holds, and since Miss Cleo isn't around to predict the future, we have to be prepared for anything. So, these tough days are really just training days for the next big thing. the next couple of weeks, my classes will finish up and things will calm down. But once they do, I can look back and say I did it! I finished all that hard work and know I can handle some stress.

The key is to trust in God, have some loving support, and see the end goal.

This might not a lot of sense, in which case, I probably need a nap. That's why it is nice that Dalena is going to drive :)

Catch you all later...probably Tuesday unless we get internet in the hotel (here's hoping for free internet)

Boom goes the dynamite

Well, so far so good. It's week two of the summer 1 courses I'm taking. In addition to that, conference season is kicking off and I'm about to have more things to do with that. It is a good time but can be a bit of a headache at times just because I don't have my usual crew of people helping out.

This coming weekend, as in, this Friday Dalena and I are traveling to Houston, then to Harlingen, and then back to Denton. You might be asking yourself why would we do this. Well, it's for my recemtly deceased Grandmother. The Lord saw fit to relieve her pain once and for all and take her away. This while somewhat sad is the reason Dalena and I are heading down to South Texas for two nights. While not the ideal roadtrip, it will provide a lot of fun moments for us to be sure.

I love the idea of celebrating a life in death. While it is important to grieve and to mourn it is also important to remember God and his words regarding death. Those who follow the Lord will not see death. This is truly one of those really cool things Jesus says in the bible but is also probably one of the things that we humans are most curious about and wish to know more. Happily, we all get to know more.

I am feeling vastly less stressed now after plowing through some satsuma homework that I actually understood. It's a funny thing about math and I, we never used to get along and I think even now we still only tolerate each other. Love it or hate it, I'm liking the fact that I'm moving further in my master's degree this summer by taking the stats class. I can't wait to graduate again. It will be a party!

For now I'm going to call it a night. The bad thing about packing each day so full is that I am so tired at night.

Until later...

Daily Planner Pads business organizer and personal calendar.

Daily Planner Pads business organizer and personal calendar.


Ask me about this thing sometime. I'll share the story of it and all the wonderful things it helps me manage. You may just fall in love with this tool as I did.

Thanks to my friend Dr. Claudia Beeny for introducing me to it.

It gets better all the time

It's funny but once you lay things out on paper, or in the case of a blog, a computer screen, things seem to be all the clearer and make so much more sense. I should have updated sooner but after my previous entry, my brain feels clearer. Despite being packed full to the brim with things to do (funeral attendance, wedding attendance, class work, work work, etc) it just doesn't seem to be so crushing.

Tis a short entry but I should remember not to doubt the power of just dumping everything out and clearing my mind.

until later...

The now

So much has happened the past few days. Summer is over now for a bit. What was once days filled with free time able to be focused toward a few special tasks is about to be filled with student affairs assessment and statistics. After that, there will be but a few short weeks and then my job training will begin and then there won't be a break until probably September. What draws me to write this evening is not the future or the past. Tonight my attention is called to the present state of things.

My grandmother, Jane Taylor passed away Saturday. Rest easy, she is in a much better place than where she was and this is a blessing for her that the good Lord finally called her up. This has hit me in a peculiar way and I find myself having a tough time nailing down how I should feel. I carry with me a certaina out of grief to be sure but this has opened my mind and body up to other ideas as well.

For the past couple of weeks I have been what some would describe as mopey. It's strange to admit but I am unsure of another way to describe it. The days are filled with freedom, unlimited purpose, however on a couple of occasions I find myself bored/mopey. Now, in this state, I make attempts to seek enjoyment from things but am finding it difficult to push through the mopiness on specific days. Please note that this is not an everyday kind of thing but I find it near impossible to nail down the root cause of this issue.

I lack a hobby, something I can do for me all on my own. Things I enjoy all involve people even things like cooking which is not nearly as fulfilling as it is when I do it for Dalena. Part of me feels pulled to break out my bible and look for the feelings to go away with the Word but I typically do not find myself sticking it out for a while.

Is ts what getting older is all about?

Prayers for my family are appreciated. Prayers fir Dalena, her mother, brother, sister, and of course their step dad Don while continues to heal. Pray for my best friend who journeys eastward to Georgia to begin the next phase of her career. For now it is time for bed. The puppies are both sleeping and now it is time for me to join them. Good night all!

this is way too responsible

Dalena and I, believe it or not, have already begun to talk about plans for retirement. I know it might sound crazy but this was one of the main areas where we really agreed. Though we're both only at the beginning of our careers we felt it necessary to come up with a plan to find out, what we need to have to retire and look at what it will take to retire when we want to do that.

It's so "responsible" but it's one of those things that we can't afford not to do. Talking about retirement at 27 is so weird though. Luckily for me, I've got a friend in the financial business and she has been helpful for us as we move forward with our plans.

This is a shorter post than normal largely because there is much to do today. We have some friends coming over for a brunch which should be nice but I wanted to toss out the thoughts on retirement stuff because it is exciting but also strange.

Plus...we have a goal to live in something like this : http://bit.ly/iZrzWC

Until later...Happy Sunday!

Credit Card Repayment Calculator

Credit Card Repayment Calculator

This is a very cool tool provided by the government. I stumbled upon it while doing some financial research. If you've never seen it give it a whirl especially if you have some sort of debt, even a tiny amount.

Saturday

It's the weekend! Hopefully all of you are doing something fun on this wonderful day. Apparently, we're supposed to hit 100 outside which doesn't make me happy. I mean, it is Texas and it is summer but I was enjoying 89. Ehh well...I can't control the weather, yet :)

Today has started out well. I made pancakes and eggs for a little brunch following Ultimate frisbee. We didn't get to play ultimate frisbee since so few showed up but ended up playing a variation of the game called hot box. It's a lot of fun and moves very fast. The game ended and I made brunch. It's been an eventful day so far. Dalena and I are about to bathe the dogs so they smell better and then we're going to wash everything too. They seem to be itching a good bit for some reason though neither of them has fleas or ticks.

Tonight I think we're having beer marinated pork chops which should be delicious. I think we'll do a salad with them too for a healthy bit of green. In case you haven't heard, the food pyramid is going away and being replaced with a dinner plate. Google it...seriously weird.

For now, I'm going to check and see if the water is warm enough to bath some stinky puppies. Until later...

Happy Saturday!

it's been a while

Hey all,

I was please to know that people actually read my blog :) YAY!

It makes it much more fun to do this knowing that there are readers. Thank you all for following and staying with it. Sorry for the delay in posting. There are things that I let get in the way of doing what I wanted to do and so I missed out on a few days.

Kerr is closed but things went very well. We had a few minor glitches but the staff pulled through and the residents are gone. Though it is empty, this is one of my favorite times of year. The noise level is much lower and things begin to smell and look better. Those of us in residence life do eventually begin to miss the residents but the wonderful part of that is this feeling of loss happens right around the time residents move back into the building. Life goes on!

News from the front...

Grades came out since my last post as well. I was extremely happy with my performance this semester and exceptionally proud of my wonderful wife. Both of us continued our domination of the academic challenges in our lives and earned all 'As'. I plan to maintain this GPA all the way through and would feel very good about this. I wish that the student I was now is the student I was then. I'm sure everyone feels that way but there is so much about myself I have learned over the years that has helped me enjoy success in and outside of the classroom. It's a little like Solomon I suppose...wisdom comes with age.

Summer being here means that the heat is on, summer conferences are about to begin, and so are summer courses. I have 2 that I will begin in June but Dalena has already started one. It keeps her very busy but I try to give her the energy she needs by keeping the coffee going and letting her focus. Her hard work has paid off in many ways. Not only is she the president elect of the counseling honor society at UNT, she is also president elect of the local chapter of the Texas Association for Play Therapy. We keep ourselves busy around here but it's all for the good of the future. She and I have some goals we'd like to accomplish and when we're ready to move our hope is that we're both marketable.

It's a fine thing to look over to my left and see Dalena hard at work. She is a bit of an inspiration and hopefully I am the same for her. Though I have a bit more free time than her (I actually have free time :)) we still manage to have fun. I think that Wine squared (http://www.winetimeswine.com/) is calling our name. It's been a tough summer so far that hasn't exactly let us take a break.

Don is doing much better which has been a big load off of Dalena I'm sure. We were really worried about him this past weekend but didn't end up having to go to Houston. He got where he needed to go and now things are much better. If you're curious about how he is doing, the link to his caringbridge is here: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/donfonseca

For now faithful readers, I believe that is all. I'm going to spend a bit more time working on my about.me page and my linkedin. If you want to see those I'll put a link to them as well. about.me is a lot like an online business card that links all of the things you have on the web in one spot. It's very cool. Linkedin is a lot like an online resume. If you don't have one...get one. I just recently learned of this and feel behind the times. (about.me/ben_taylor)

Have a good night all. Until next time...

the beginning of the end

The week has started off decently enough. I turned my work in so I haven't had to stress much about school since Sunday. It is day 2 of closedown week which means lots of people are cleaning, packing, and moving. It is an exciting time to see so much change.

At the same time, I will miss the students and staff that are here during the year. I always hate the Spring because it means saying goodbye to some pretty amazing leaders and residents. I spend much time looking back on the year and reflecting on areas where I could have been better, things I could have done, and people I could have met. It's been a huge year for me.

Tomorrow marks 2 months of marriage. I hope it never gets old to count the months. This blog post is a bit jumpy from topic to topic but my brain is feeling that way right now...to my few but faithful readers, I'm sorry :)

Anyway, 2 months of marriage, yada yada yada, It's wonderful! I wish that things were a bit calmer for Dalena right now though. She is finishing school for the semester and spending a good bit of time worried about her family. Her step dad is still in the hospital and is struggling a bit. Dalena is really worried about her mom too. It's a rough time for her but with time, things get better, even when they really seem to stink.

She and I have been talking a good bit about the future and where we want to be. I think we're both so excited about the last 2 months and are ready to look forward. It's scary but also exciting. Change is exciting. I guess that's why this time of year is so much fun to me. I stay flexible so when things happen, I adapt and can progress forward. As each new event comes, I can experience it with Dalena and that is itself, a ton of fun.

for now, I must say good night. I have to be mentally awake a bit earlier than normal tomorrow for my evaluation with the bosses. It will be fun because they typically are fun but I still get nervous. I always worry that I'm not doing the job that is expected of me. I guess that is a good thing. Overconfidence will bite me in the rear if I'm not careful.

Good night all

weird feeling

I got a weird feeling today outside of Walgreens. Dalena and I were going to pick up a few things and a random dude knocked on my door. I saw this guy as we pulled into the space with a few dollars in hand so I figured he was going to ask me for money. This has happened on more than 1 occasion in this particular area. I got out of the car, and he did ask me for money after explaining his plight. Basically, he needed $20 to get firestone to come over, jack up his car, and then help him get the spare tire.

The weird feeling came when I tried to think about what to say. "No, I won't give you any money" didn't come out. Rather, I deferred to hollering at my wife after we got into the store because I didn't have cash. The guy mentioned something about me going to an ATM but that sounded shady. Dalena and entered the store, picked up our items and I spent the entire time in Walgreens debating back and forth about whether or not to take out $10 and give it to this guy. I felt sick inside, my stomach turning in knots.

Why did I feel this way you might ask? I've always been the nice guy. I'd love to help out everyone but after being the nice guy, I've gotten screwed over quite a bit. You see, the nice guy is nice to everyone but everyone isn't always nice to him. I've watched movies, TV and I've seen the news. Nice guy gives stranger some cash, but after pulling out his wallet, gets jumped for everything he has.

I was thinking about the Christian thing to do. I am reminded of the various parables and other stories about the good Samaritan, the woman who snubs the dirty homeless man who turns out to actually be Jesus, and the countless other tales of the diamond in the rough who is looking for that nice person to come along. Am I obligated to help this man? Is that the right thing to do?

The thing that threw me was that he asked for money. If he had asked to borrow my jack, or some tool, or asked for help changing the flat, I'd have done that without question. Instead, he asked me for $17 and offered to give me $40 in food in return for my assistance. What would you have done in the same situation?

As it happens, we did not give the man any money and I left Walgreens feeling weird and a lot like I should have given him something. If I had cash on me I'd have probably given him money but then I can say I'd probably have felt weird about doing that too. It's a strange thing.

For now, I must say good night. It's a big day back at work tomorrow after being out for a few days. The residents are packing to leave and the RAs are finishing finals. Here's to move out week!

Week in Review

I'm not sure what kind of information could possibly top Sunday May 1st. I'll see what I can do though. The week was rather eventful and a lot has happened since my last entry. As is customary, I'll start at the beginning :)

Dalena hopped a plane and made it safely to Houston Sunday night. I spent Sunday worried for her but knowing that the weather she was flying into was 100% better than what she flew out of. The RLAC Banquet, (end of year banquet for the Resident Assistant staff) was going on and I was trying to stay present there as several of my staff members were nominated for awards. Though none of them won, I was very proud of them anyway. It was a rough semester and they did well.

After the reception, all the craziness from the last entry happened. Fast forward to Monday. Staying up really late to play on twitter after a huge world event takes place does not for a good Monday make. Begrudingly, I woke up and got ready for the week. I find it odd that though I've not been married that long, I do not sleep well when my wife is not next to me. (sappy I know, but from the guys I've talked to, this holds true) The week started out and I just seemed to be a step behind. I'm not sure what was going on other than, I was stressed about the end of the year, worried about Dalena and her family, trying to figure out how I was going to get all the things that I do done for this week and next.

Thank God, Monday came and went and while I still felt overwhelmed, it wasn't quite as bad as this might read. Tuesday was spent preparing for my class which involved a presentation I needed to make about the final project. (Side note, I'm thinking of trying to get published with some of this research so here is hoping that happens) The class went very long and made for a very late night since Tuesday night is Kerr Hall staff night. Dalena's step dad was doing all right but as rough as my week was so far, Dalena and her mom were having a rougher one. They spent Sunday-Tuesday night in the ICU waiting room.

Wednesday, I woke up and packed my clothes. I was heading to Houston after work on this day. That drive ends up getting harder and harder each time I do it. I seriously wish that someone would hurry up and make a flying car. I've got the perfect prototype right here.

Anyway, we don't have flying cars that can travel through time so I huffed it and made the drive. I am so happy to have a Mom like mine. She opened her home to Dalena and her mom and they spent the night in a reclined position in the dark. Apparently the waiting room doesn't dim the lights so they slept in a brightly lit waiting room without taking a shower.

Since I arrived to Houston, we've spent a lot of hours sitting in the Shock and Trauma Intensive Care Unit waiting for good news. It's a sad place that can really get you down if you don't take a break now and then. Some people are there hoping for a miracle and some people are there that get to see one. It's a beautiful yet grusome place. That good news we were waiting for finally came today. For a full update on Don's condition, check out his caringbridge blog. I'll share the link later on but Don is doing much better today and is actually at the point in his recovery that he should be at. Doctors are very happy with his progress and plan to perform surgery on Monday. I kind of wish I could observe this because it is going to be 6 to 9 hours worth of work starting at the top of his head and working down, repairing bones and his eye as best they can.

For now, that is about all that is going on. I feel blessed to have been able to be here with Dalena and her family. It's been a lot of sitting but on the plus side, I've been able to get homework done and meet some new people in the process too. I'm sure our dogs hate that we've been gone so much but Mom takes them out and has been spoiling them. If she spoils our dogs like this I can only imagine what she is going to do with an actual grandchild.

Tomorrow we hit the road back to our home in Denton. Dalena is a little on the stressed side now because she has a lot of work to finish and missed a full week of school work and seeing clients. We are both so glad that this week ended with a high note though and hope that things continue moving in a positive direction for Don. For the most recent updates on his condition, go here: http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/donfonseca

I hope you all have a restful sleep. If you pray, think about praying for Don and his recovery, for Dalena's Mom to get some rest and ease the worry in her heart, for the doctors as they prepare for the full day of surgery Monday.

Take some time this weekend to clear your mind of the worry that rests inside you. I know I feel better when I get rid of that. Have a great weekend all!

What a day

Today was full of all sorts of emotionally powerful things. Some were amazing events and others were quite traumatic. It feels so long that I can't believe all the things that have happened. Here goes the run down.

Church this morning was pretty thought provoking. Working through the Book of Romans, we talked about the real problem with the world. All too often, people get caught up with the symptoms rather than dealing with the root of the issue. We as a people are distracted by so many other things that we forget the real reason we're here and who put us here. God. It was a great service and led to some great discussion over pancakes with Dalena.

After breakfast, we did some work around the apartment and did a little bit of homework. Dalena did more work while I watched some basketball. We got some bad news about an accident that her step dad had while working at home and which caused him to be airlifted to Houston Medical Center. We have been praying for him all day and the prognosis didn't look good earlier. We're still not sure how he is. Dalena hopped a plane to Houston and is there now. Hopefully everything turns out for the best.

Ma Mere, my grandmother, was admitted to the hospital today too. She recently had surgery to repair her pacemaker which was working poorly and it started to cause vibrations. She needed to be admitted so that it can be repaired.

I'm glad that both people are where they need to be so hopefully everyone will come out doing well.

After seeing Dalena off to the airport (Thanks Katie for taking her) Kerr staff headed to the RLAC banquet with a special guest. It was wonderful to see Lauren Dollarhide up at the podium speaking to us. She is an inspirational young woman who is in store to do some great things. God is good.

And now, as I type this post, I learn that Osama bin Laden has been killed. This closes a window to the much larger building of the war on terror. It's a bittersweet thing I suppose. One head to the hydra has been cut but now we as a people must watch out for the 3 heads that will pop up.

I just got an update on Dalena's step dad. He is out of surgery and has to make it through for now so that is good to hear.

What a full day!

Till tomorrow.

Pray for Don's recovery, Diricia's (Dalena's mom) worry and grief to be lessened, Demi and Dalena to be helped through this difficult time too. Pray for my grandmother and her healing in the hospital. Pray for the 9/11 victims and families. May they be at peace.

What a night.

the weekend

It's the weekend! Actually, the weekend is almost over. Sunday comes quick and it will be a full day of various activities. we have church, some homework, and then I'm attending a banquet and Dalena is going to our home group meeting. We will reconnect after all of that but tomorrow is going to be full of hopping from thing to thing. Whew!

This weekend has been really good so far. I woke up early this morning and put a lot of my online class behind me. It set me up to finish it quickly later on that day. I was hoping for a good game of ultimate to get me to run around a bit but we didn't have enough. Instead, we played a different game that shrinks the ultimate field down and requires everyone to play defense and make good, accurate, short throws. It was a decent game but I would have loved to play a full fledged game. Perhaps next weekend. (That reminds me, I've got to add anyone and everyone I've ever played with to try and grow the frisbee group)

The Laue's baby shower today was really cute. I am so excited for them and Dalena is too. We are glad to have them as friends and can't wait to see them begin their parental journey. It's so weird to have friends with babies and then to think that the whole dad thing isn't that far off for me. CRAZY! Exciting but crazy! It seems like only yesterday...

Ok, no flashbacks this time. It feels good to get stuff done this weekend though. My home desk is still a little messy. Dalena's side is too though so I don't feel too bad. We were having a silly play argument earlier which distracted both of us from doing the actual work we set out to do. Ehh well! Those silly games are what make being married so much fun.

For now, I'm going to work on my about.me and other pages. I'm slow to the tech stuff and only recently did my first googledoc. If you have never used that, it is wonderful. I'm going to need to get a vitae together too. It's a lot of work but will be helpful in the long run. I hope to have that, my about.me, linkedin, and a couple of other nice things looking really good by the end of May. It's a good goal.

As it is getting late, I think we're going to start settling down and might catch a movie. I might try to get us up early to run tomorrow. We need to get back to working out so we can run the White Rock half marathon. I can't wait to do that race with my wife. She has not idea how great she will feel.

Night all!

My mind

I have a lot on my mind right now. There is a large amount of stuff going on at work, with school and just life in general I suppose. The end of the academic year up to this point in my life has always had an effect on me that causes me to reflect on the state of things. In addition to that, there are many changed taking place all around me which is even further causing me to wonder some things. Now, where to begin? I guess there is a beginning so here goes.

My first cause of concern is on the large scale. I am not happy with the state of things in the world. I have felt for a long time now that as a society and people we are more broken than anyone ever thought and it seems to be getting worse not better. I am worried for the future and what that will hold. At this point my work environment is pretty safe but for how long will that last? My job security depends upon the ability of others to afford to pay to attend an institution of higher learning. As funding and support for universities and financial aid dwindle it becomes more difficult for others to get here. What will happen then? My other cause for concern is that I am at a transitional stage of life. While yes, I am not going anywhere soon, I am beginning to explore what is out there and what I need to be doing to get the next job. My real question though:

What is the next job?

The world is a scary place and I'm willing to accept that there isn't anything I can do on my own to change how it is so I will sit back and let God tackle that one and if He should decide to use me for that then so be it.

Let's take a look back at the previous year. Walk with me...

I taught a class. That was pretty exciting and time consuming. I'm leaning more firmly toward not doing that again but it felt so good to teach that I almost want to do it again. Almost. I have a job and I can't do it and teach at the level I hold myself to for both. I feel like I let that slip this year overall and even though things seemed to go well, there is a big part of me that feels like I could have and should have done better.

Taught the class. Got married! That was the highlight of this year. It's been so wonderful to this point and I know it will continue moving forward well. We are worshipping together, budgeting together, saving together, and many other things. It feels great to take care of someone and be taken care of. I still find myself in disbelief. I think it stems from it being so good and me not wanting it to all be a dream. If it is a dream, let me stay asleep.

I have begun a process to reinstate communication between me and family that became estranged. As someone who loves everyone and strives to find the good in all no matter who or what they are, I can't sit idly by and allow my family to be so distant from me when they put firth effort I will be matching it. So far reconnecting leads to success. I'll stick with it.

I have started and stopped working out many times. Come on Taylor. Get it together. No joke, I need and want to want to start again and get healthier. Grr!

a month ago today

March 11th was a memorable day for me and for the rest of the world. As I look back at wedding pictures and read the journal I kept on the honeymoon, I can't help but relive those amazing days. Dalena was so happy (still is too). I remember the first look I got of her when she was walking down the aisle in the gorgeous dress. It was a special and I will treasure that memory always.

As it happens, our wedding took place on the same day as the terrible earthquake and terrible tsunami that has ravaged Japan. We spent a fair amount of time watching BBC news on the honeymoon to pay attention to world events. It is difficult to have such a joyous occasion on a day that is filled with so much pain for so many. I recall the nights I prayed for the people of Japan and the families that were experiencing such pain. The only explanation I can muster is that God has a reason for everything.

My wedding day is forever locked in history for me for several reasons. A month has passed and Japan has yet to return to normalcy. Dalena and I are also not quite at a normal state either. It's a funny thing this whole marriage thing. We are both so happy but there are little things that we never thought would matter.

Scheduling is the big area we're working on right now. We are busy people and both of us had personal goals that now became shared goals. Dalena is an amazing woman who is tackling a difficult educational program. I am working on my 2nd degree and working full time. That said, we're loving life, each other and God. Personally, I have felt my faith grow so much since we met for the first time.

I always wondered how I would know who the woman I would marry. The truth is that I didn't until I did. Dalena and I met and something awoke inside of me and began churning. There were prays that escaped from my lips asking for the words, the courage, and the trust that she would be mine. March 11, 2011, I got my wish. The world, much like love, is such a tumultuous entity. God has some amazing power that can unite two people in such a strong way and He can ravage a country by shaking the very ground it sits upon.

I am thankful that our first month has been going so well, thankful that we have put together a lovely home, and that we can enjoy the company of loved ones without fear. It's truly a gift. I look forward to the day when we are able to spend more time together but we're united for the rest of our lives. In the coming weeks, I plan on working on my ability to be present in the moment, a skill we both wish to practice, my discipline to working out and reading the word, two more things both of us wish to do.

Here's to a month of marriage, and the many more we may be granted.

Training

My 27th birthday came and went with little surprise. I wanted to do something significant so with my good friend Lori, I decided to run the Rock and Roll half marathon. I did not train for this race and did it just for fun. I felt great afterward other than being sore. This got me thinking. If I did my running and then the other working out I'm doing, I could be really strong and potentially have a great race at White Rock in December. I'm not sure if I will run the full or the half at this point but I think I like the idea of the half marathon. Even more importantly, I like the idea of doing the half marathon with my wife.

Dalena said she would try so now it is my goal to coach her along and get her ready. We've got plenty of time to make this happen as White Rock is 9 months away. The first step is a 5k and then we're going to move up from there. She will be doing the insanity and p90x with me too which will be great for her. This will be lots of fun for the 2 of us to do and I can't wait to take this on.

It will be my goal to document this journey together similarly to the honeymoon journey. We'll see how it goes.


Until later...

Lazy sunday

Today is a lazy Sunday which in my opinion is the best kind of Sunday. So far vie managed to do a whole lot of nothing. I made brunch for dalena and I which was tasty and now I sit on a couch next to her watching Lord of The Rings which is a great movie. At this point I should mention that the two towers is my favorite of the trilogy. Great music, epic battle...it's got it all.

I wonder what tolkein thinks of the movies. It'd be nice to know if he pictured Middle Earth looking like that. I have also seen a lot of the same similarities to Christianity that C.S. Lewis' narnia stories have. It is interesting to me how most stories of good versus evil can go back to the original good versus evil story.

I'm typing on an iPad again which I really like but I can't add pictures or anything exciting to my posts which is sad but oh well. I never used to add pics to the old blog but it is nice to do.

Anyway, I'm getting back to being lazy...and the battle for Helm's Deep.

First day

No more pencils, no more books...yeah right.

Today was the first day of school for me again. I say school, it was my first day back since last semester. It's going to be a great semester though. Not only am I getting married, but my classes are going to be really interesting, and I'm doing some things at work to make it even more fun than before. I'm looking forward to the new experiences coming up.

Class today talked about diversity which is always an interesting topic. I'm curious to see how the union of my family and Dalena's family plays out on the wedding day. While I know everyone will mean well, there is a bit of stress coming from two groups of people with their own traditions and ideas about things coming together. It's going to make me a little nervous. this all ties together because my family is a biracial group while Dalena's is not. We'll see how it ends up going. I'm sure everything will be wonderful.

Here's to tomorrow. It's not a class day but it should be a good one anyway. I might actually turn it into a homework day. Who knows? For now, good night.

Working so hard...

It's taken a tremendous amount of work just to be able to blog tonight. For some reason I'm having to write in HTML format instead of letting google do the hard work for me. Ehh well. I'm writing while kayoing in bed so I can't complain too much. Tomorrow I continue my journey through graduate school and try to solve the issues we had this weekend. Hopefully everything is resolved.

I spent today with Dalena. We ran errands and got to set up our things from the bridal shower. Thank you all for your wonderful gifts. Together, the 2 of us hope to make a wonderful home. Yay for that!

I've been very proud of Dalena and I. We've managed to get all our premarital counseling homework done and we've had some amazing conversations about us, being married, kids, and all of that but there is still so much more to go over. I reallyy cannot wait to finally say I do and just be married. One of the other incredible by products of doing a bible study together but also from having our great conversation is that I feel like vie learned more about my own faith within this whole process. I realized how much praying I did after finding Dalena than I did before and I can't attribute that to anything she did. She didn't do anything. I can say however, that meeting "the one" is a wonderful but also a scary experience.

It's a much anticipated event and I can't wait to finally join together with Dalena and start our lives as a married couple. Bring it on!

Running through my head

what happens when I'm awake at 2am

Due to some crazy things happening at work, I'm awake at 2am waiting for 3am to roll around. In any case, on my walk, I started to think about a journal post and here we are.

The day I met Dalena came to my mind and I've actually been thinking a good bit about this moment in my life. It actually is a huge moment that looking back now, I can truly appreciate the significance. Before I go on though, I want to first say that I'm currently reading Eat, Pray, Love. I realize that with the friends I have, this truth is going to draw some serious jokes and that is fine. The story is very good and is something we can all relate to...heart ache. The character in the book is suffering from a tremendous amount of heart ache and while any guy out there can say he doesn't care, the truth is, at some point he did and got burned so bad that he no longer cares. In other words, some woman messed him up good. Anyway, in Eat, Pray, Love, the main character goes on a year of world and self discovery. She eats some amazing food, does some yoga and so far is chilling in India.

The story seems to be pretty good although there is a fair amount of whining. I am not a huge fan of this but I get the purpose behind it. Anyway, besides thinking about this book, I've been thinking about my journey through my faith. I recall the night I met Dalena because it was the night that something woke up and demanded that I pay attention. I prayed a tremendous amount that night and quite often several nights after. That had never happened to me before and it was the biggest reason why I ended up popping the question to a little more than a year later. It's also the reason why I can't wait to begin life with her and raise a family with her.

I don't expect that anyone will read this and I think I just wanted to get it down on "paper" to remember it later on. It's good to remember things and I'm not even sure Dalena knows this story.